Like any mom, I used to believe that I possess the world’s largest encyclopedia of answers to any of my kids’ question.
But, this changed recently when my 4-year-old started asking me a set of questions that I hardly knew how to answer. That’s when I remembered what my mom told me when I was going through many parenting books –
“You would never know enough”.
And believe me, these questions that I faced could perplex all well-prepared moms and dads.
If you don’t believe me, this is what my son asked, to which I either had no right answer or didn’t know how to handle the question:
Son: Momma, Why Do People Die?
Me: What happened? Why are you asking this honey?
*My son hugged me tightly and started crying*
After talking to him for 15 minutes, I came to know that his best friend’s grandfather just expired. His best friend-Rimi was very upset as she got to know from her parents that she won’t be able to see her grandfather. Ever.
My son was concerned about his safety and wanted to check if my husband and I would also die leaving him alone.
After figuring out what was really bothering him, I hugged him tightly and told him that our whole family will make sure that he’s taken care of. How his uncles, sisters, brothers, aunts and specifically my husband and I will make sure nothing happens to him.
Son: Why Can’t We Get A New Car Like Sid? Are We Poor?
Me: Beta, There are things that we can buy and the things we can’t buy. Like every family, adults make 3 lists of items
Items that a family can buy during normal days
Items that a family buys only on holidays
Items that a family can’t buy
Since it is the responsibilities of adults to create those lists, you can share with us what you want to buy. Based on the lists, we will let you know where the item falls.
Son: Who Is God?
This one was really a tough one as I am still trying to find out my own belief system. So, I told him, “God is someone you feel, even though you cannot see Him. And as you will grow, you will find moments when you will feel God is with you or watching over you and your family.
Son: Why Do You and Daddy Fight?
We always made sure that we don’t fight in front of our son. But I guess, during some weak moments, we yelled at each other. And, then our son assumed that my husband and I don’t love each other.
Me: Your dad and I really love each other. Right now, we are working on fixing some problems. So, when adults try to fix problems, sometimes they get angry at each other for a short while. But, that doesn’t mean they don’t love each other.
Son: Where Did I Come From?
As I never wanted to share too much of information for him to absorb, I decided to stick to simple facts:
Me: You grew inside my tummy.
Son: How I came there?
Me: Dad put a seed in Momma’s tummy, out of which you were born.
He definitely was not completely convinced, but probably saved the follow-up questions for a later date.
Every time I think about these questions, I realize that motherhood is a new learning every day! While I tried my level best to answer these questions, let me know if you feel I could have handled any question better.
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this post are the personal views of the author. They do not necessarily reflect the views of I for Her. Authors are responsible for any omissions or errors. And, I for Her does not assume any liability or responsibility for them.