With the best intentions at heart, many of us have been guilty of putting pressure on our kids. Whether it is about being a better student a better person, all of us have pushed them hard at some point.
We want to see our kids as successful individuals and for which, we stress the importance of academics.
In this quest to make them good students and successful individuals of tomorrow, we become so obsessed with their academics, that we teach our kids everything – from fundamental of science to maths and much more.
But, what we forget to teach them are the basic life skills – being happy, being confident and being strong in the case of failures.
We forget to teach them –
How to handle failures when everyone around them expects them to succeed?
How to handle self when they fail to bear the burden of their own and other’s expectation?
And, How not to lose self-confidence or let themselves down in case of adversity?
And, How to let go of failures and move ahead?
Unfortunately, the lack of these basic skills leads to stress, anxiety and mental illness in our kids. And neither our kids nor we are prepared for these challenges.
No wonder the W.H.O. study found that India has the highest suicide rates among those aged 15 to 29.
Recently, an IIT student committed suicide as he felt he had no reason to live. He thought he let down his parents and wasted their sacrifices.Â
And now within the month, another 18-year-old college student ended his life. Guruprasad Ghadge who couldn’t handle the burden of disappointing his parents.
While sharing the details of the incident with India Today, the police shared,
An 18-year-old college student allegedly committed suicide by hanging himself at his house in Beed district of Maharashtra apparently as he was depressed over failing to become a “good human being” and fulfill his parents’ expectations
The incident came to light on Wednesday evening when the student was alone at home as his mother was admitted to a hospital and father was at work.
As per the police, before ending his life, the boy scribbled a “suicide note” on the wall of his house.
“The student, Guruprasad Ghadge, ended his life by hanging himself in his study room using his mother’s saree.”
“Although the exact reason behind his extreme step is yet to be known, police found a ‘suicide note’ written on the wall of the study room.”
While recalling the details of the note, the police shared:
“The note said- ‘Living in this world is much tougher than we think and I made every effort to become a good human being, but failed every time.
Mom, dad, I could not become your good son, forgive me. I will not able to stay alive in this situation…I quit’,”
It was his father, Ramprasad Ghadge, who teaches specially-abled children, found Guruprasad when he returned home from the school. As per the report,
“Ghadge found the study room locked from inside. As there was no response despite repeated knocking, he broke open the door with the help of neighbours and found Guruprasad’s body hanging from the ceiling,”
Though Guruprasad was rushed to a hospital, he was declared brought dead.
As we mourn the death of this young boy, we couldn’t help but wonder if Guruprasad would have sought some help:
If he would have spoken about his feeling with someone
If someone would have told him that he was doing his level best and he doesn’t need to be scared of letting anyone down.Â
The increasing number of suicides among young Indian kids make us wonder is it our obsession with our kids’ future, that our kids succumb to the pressure.
Why can’t we accept that our kids are ‘humans’ with their own desires, dreams, aspirations, and potential?
It is a high time to let our kids know that irrespective of what they achieve or not achieve, we would love them anyway. And, whenever things will go wrong, we will always be standing right behind them. We’ll always have their back!
At I FOR HER, we are mourning the death of this young boy and hoping his parents gather the courage to accept the ugly reality of their son’s death.
R.I.P Guruprasad, You’ll be missed!
If you have any PARENTING ADVICE that can help parents guard their kids against the menace of depression, stress, and anxiety, then please connect with us so that we can spread a word. We believe together we can make a difference.