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Home > Health > Mental Health

Letter To A Toxic Person Who Hurt Me: A Perfect Message

by Guest Contributor
July 11, 2024

Discover a powerful and liberating “Letter To A Toxic Person Who Hurt Me,” filled with truth, strength, and emotional healing. This message is a perfect way to overcome pain and reclaim your life beyond the impact of toxicity. 

Letter To The Toxic Person Who Hurt Me

Letter to toxic person who has hurt me - IForHer

Like many, I’ve been hurt by a toxic person in my life. And, after struggling for a very long time, I couldn’t find a better way than writing this letter to heal myself.

The toxic person who gave me anger and pain still lives in my head rent-free. But not anymore. You can also try to write a similar letter to free yourself from the pain that you never deserved in the first place. It is not only therapeutic but also worth an attempt to show some self-love.

Here’s the letter:

Letter to the toxic person who hurt me: You never deserved me! Am letting you go!

Dear ‘Toxic You’,

I loved you more than I loved myself. And, it was the biggest mistake of my life.

We never talked about the pain and anger that you gave me. And, believe me, we don’t even need to.

Because there is no point in reliving the crap that happened or remembering all the ill things you said and did to me. Right now I feel very different about all those painful words and actions than how I felt years ago.

With time, I realized I didn’t want any revenge for that heart-wrenching pain.

Now, I just want peace and love for myself.

I have neither forgotten nor forgiven what you said or did. Sometimes, I still think about it but I simply let it go. I let it go because I don’t want to waste my time and energy to think about those painful and hurtful moments.

I know what you did to me was horrible. You know it too!

Your ego might not let you accept your fault or let you apologize. But who cares?

I really don’t give a sh*t about how you feel. Know why?

Because I’m too busy being happy and making sure I feel good about my life and myself. I am a good person and I have every right to be happy. Why I should pay the price for your rudeness and negativity?

I don’t really have time anymore to wonder why and how you could be so mean to me.

Your hurtful doing is your KARMA, not mine. So, you need to live with that, I don’t.

You did what you did because I let you do it to me.

At that moment in life, I wanted you to like me so desperately that I offered my self-worth in place of your love, care and approval.

And, believe me, it isn’t an easy thing to do. It is the most courageous act that one can do for someone.

But, your continued mean behavior made me realize that you don’t deserve it. So, I let you go!

Your anger, your sadness, and your resentment made me sad and depressed for a long time.

But, with the passing time, my wounded self has healed itself.

And now, I have found the most precious things that your toxicity sucked out of my life: Self-Love, Self-Respect, Kindness & Peace.

And, I am not going to let them go at any cost.

For a very very  long time, I hated you.

I held onto the negative things that you said and did to me.

Not only I wished horrible things on you, I cursed you.


Also Read: Simple Tips To Get Peace Of Mind


But after a while, I realized that it wasn’t hurting you at all.

Rather, it was just Destroying Me! Rotting Me! Tormenting Me! Hurting Me!

Thinking about the shitty thing that you did to me, my blood used to boil. And, I would get angry, so angry, sometimes even scream and cry.

But then one fine day, I realised how short life is. And, I lost such a valuable time on cursing, weeping or whining. But not anymore. My life has only place for joy, love, happiness and peace.

So, I forgive you just for me, not for you.

I don’t think I will ever forget what happened. But I will make sure that it doesn’t stay in my head for more than a second.


Also Read: Open Letter To Those Who Struggle With Negative Thoughts 


And, I do sincerely hope that life will enlighten you soon. The way you treat people shows a lot about the sadness and darkness you carry in your heart.

They say people change with time. I hope you do too!

Peace and Love,

The Healing Soul Who Doesn’t Want Your Toxicity In Her Life

Some tips to heal yourself after being hurt by a toxic person

Overcoming the pain after being hurt by a toxic person can be a challenging process, but it is possible with time and self-compassion. Other than writing letter,  here are some steps that may help:

1. Set boundaries

Establish firm boundaries with the toxic person to protect yourself from further harm. This may involve limiting or cutting off contact with them to create a safe space for your emotional well-being.

2. Seek support

Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist who can provide a supportive and non-judgmental environment. Talking about your experiences with someone you trust can help in releasing emotional burdens.

3. Practice self-love

Be kind and gentle with yourself during this healing process.  Prioritize self-care activities that promote your well-being, such as exercise, meditation, hobbies, or spending time in nature.

4. Focus on personal growth & positivity

Use this experience as an opportunity to focus on personal growth. Surround yourself with positivity and things that bring you joy. Engage in activities that uplift your spirits and reinforce a sense of hope and happiness.

5. Let go of Anger

Holding onto resentment and anger can prolong the healing process. Work on forgiving the toxic person, not for their sake, but for your emotional freedom.

Remember that healing is a journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. Each individual’s healing process is unique, so be patient and compassionate with yourself as you work through the pain and gradually regain emotional well-being.

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