One thing that scares Indian society and Indian parents the most is the word ‘Divorce’. Yes, divorce. Because as per Indian society, marriages are meant for a lifetime. Whether you are happy or sad; excited or disappointed; in love or out of love, you need to stay married.
Because, even in the 21st century, being married means success; and being divorced means failure. Divorce is still taboo for many Indian parents. Indian parents are so scared of divorce that they force their kids to stay and suffer in unhappy marriages. The ugly reality of Indian marriages and the fear of divorce was beautifully captured by the movie Dil Dhadakne Do.
Dil Dhadakne Do showed a couple that was really unhappy in marriage. This unhappy couple was expert at pretending to be happy in their marriage in front of their friends and family. Remember, they took their friends and family on a cruise to celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary.
But, the reality of their marriage was quite saddening. With a cheating and unloving husband, Neelam, (Shefali Shah) was quite evidently suffering in an abusive marriage. Throughout the movie, she was in so much pain.
But not even once, did she entertain the idea of moving out of an abusive marriage.
She feared the word divorce so much that even when her own daughter shares her struggle in the unhappy marriage, she gave her advice to adjust. On hearing about her daughter’s plan to divorce, she blinds herself to her pain and suffering. Rather, than comforting her daughter, she gets angry at her.
In a nutshell, these parents suffering in an abusive marriage themselves, expect their kids to suffer in theirs.
But, what to do when your child refuses to suffer in a troubled marriage? There is a set protocol. First, parents blame their kids for ruining their prestige and name in society. Because, log kya kahenge? Then, they blame each other for not giving the right parenting advice to their kid. And, then society blames parents for not giving the child the right sanskaar.
And, once the blame game doesn’t reap any results, parents come up with just the perfect cure for their kid’s troubled marriage – Have a child!
But when nothing works out, they leave no stone unturned in emotionally blackmailing you. They even go to the extent of giving their kids cheap threats of killing themselves.
It is sad how even in the 21st century, Indian parents are so scared of divorce. They are so bothered by what people would say that they are even okay to let their kids suffer in an abusive marriage for life long. We wish Indian parents would understand that divorce isn’t punishment; staying in an unhappy marriage is!
