In a country where women are judged for every aspect of their lives, it needs a real brave heart to be a single mother.
And, if you are an unmarried woman in your early 30s who decides to adopt a child, then you definitely one of the few courageous women, who are strong enough to live the life on her own terms.
One such brave-heart is Pune-based Amita Marathe!
In 2012, when she registered herself with the Child Child Adoption Resource Authority (CARA) at Sofosh, hardly she knew how much love and happiness was waiting for her in the near future.
In a society, where a single woman after a certain age is subject to shame, Amita’s parents not only respected her decision but also supported her throughout her motherhood journey.
While talking to The Better India, she shared:
“I never wanted to get married, but I always wanted my own child. Among all options, I found adoption to be the best. My parents and sister stood like a rock throughout the process.”
Recalling her parents’ concern about raising a child alone, Amita further added:
“They were worried about how I would manage my career and daughter, considering how demanding the two roles are. To an extent, even I had the same concerns, but I believed in myself and took the plunge.”
And, after waiting for a long time, on one sunny day in August 2013, she received the most awaited phone call. It was from the child care center in Pune regarding her adoption application of adopting a girl child.
As none of the girls in her list was available that day, destiny had a different plan for her!
While recalling her most memorable moment, she shared:
“When the person-in-charge told me about a five-month girl who was also put up for adoption, I had my reservations. Her condition was not the issue, but her age was. I wanted a child who was a year old at least so that I could also balance my career.”
But when Amita laid her eyes on the baby, all her concerns vanished.
“It was love at first sight. The moment I saw her, I knew she was the one. Bringing her home was the happiest day of my life”
She named her daughter Advaita and gave her the best medication available in Pune.
“The doctors said that a surgery could be done only after she weighed 16 kilos, which would take some time.”
As any new mom, Amita’s career took a back seat, and Advaita became her only priority for the next three years. And, before Advaita even turned one, they witnessed a miracle.
“With the right medications and care, her defective heart was fixed. She is now hail and hearty.”
When she was a little over one, Amita decided to tell her about the adoption and how her family was different.
“I am proud of my status and my decision. I wanted her to know the truth and be prepared for the questions that will come to her when she grows up. In fact, there was an incident when she lied about having a father.”
“I want my daughter to know that having a single parent does not mean that her family is incomplete. I want her to stand up against all the mocking, and proudly declare that she was raised by a single mother.”
Through stories and pictures, Amita attempts to share the truth while keeping two very important things in mind,
“I didn’t want our relationship to be labelled a certain way or ever make her feel unwanted. Secondly, I wanted her to respect her birth mother.”
“The process was emotionally exhausting. I was worried if she would react negatively. But my child is more mature than I imagined.”
When Advaita turned three, Amita got back to work at a private firm as a Business Analyst.
Now, Amita has also taken up the task of spreading awareness about adoption and helping parents in their adoption journey.
She is a trustee at Poornank, an organization committed to the same. They have more than 600 parents, who have adopted children of varied ages.
Motherhood has definitely made Amita’s life beautiful and happy.
And, while talking to The Better India, Amita shared what one should keep in mind before making the decision to adopt:
“Do not go by logic, go by heart. Adoption can change multiple lives. The ride will not be easy, but will definitely be worth it.”
The path chosen by Amita is definitely not an easy one.
She has shattered the stereotypes, to walk on the path of love, care, and empathy. For choosing the road less traveled we at I FOR HER salute her.
If you wish to know more about Poornank, contact them here. You can also write to them at sangeeta@sroat.org.
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