Being a single woman has always been tough in Indian society. In a society that judges and labels single women as misfit, the inspiring story of legendary actress Asha Parekh is for every independent girl, who wants to live life on her own terms.
Every Indian girl is raised with the expectation that she has to be married one day. And in order to fulfill that expectation, many times women are either forced to get married to undeserving men. In case a woman shows the courage to be single, she is taunted by our society at every step.
But, Asha Parekh was neither scared of society nor feared to stay alone. Even in the 1960s, when society was way more conservative than today, Asha lived life on her own terms.
In an interview with Verve Magazine, Asha opens up about her experience of not getting married and never regretting it. During the interview, Asha was asked if she ever considered getting married because of fear of being alone during old age. To which she replied:
“Not at all. I saw the kind of people that were out there. When I went out with the boys that my mother set me up with, I was completely put off by the whole premise of marriage. They were so fussy!”
Sharing how she chose to be single as she wasn’t ready to give up her self-respect and independence, she mentioned:
“I know it seems silly but these little things really nettled me. There was also the case of my heroes Rajesh Khanna and Vinod Khanna getting an earful from their girlfriends during outstation shoots because they were gallivanting and making merry at night instead of being in bed. I would’ve never been able to take someone dictating terms to me — I was just not cut out for it.”
Though Asha never had the regret of not getting married, she shared that one regret she will always have:
“I love children. I did come across a child that triggered a fervent maternal instinct in me, but he was suffering from some birth defects and the doctors refused to let me adopt him. They asked me to select another child, but my love for this child I didn’t even know was unrelenting and I was adamant about adopting only him. But it was not to be.”
And, focusing on how her friends helped her to sail through bouts of depression and mental health, she shared:
“My friends are why I’ve managed to hold on to my sanity and fight bouts of depression. Shammiji (Nargis Rabadi) was always with me before she passed away last year.”
Further adding details about her gang of girls, she shared:
“I am closer to Waheeda (Rehman) and Helen because we travel together. Recently we went to Turkey and did a Scandinavian cruise. Waheeda and I then went to Alaska and Canada, and just a month ago, we went to Tadoba Andhari Tiger Reserve. You can never completely confide in your mother or a sibling, but close friends will never judge you.”
While sharing the best marriage advice to millennial couples, she shared:
“Marriage is not all rainbows and butterflies; you have to give in to your partner’s whims every now and then, and that’s a two-way street.”
At IFORHER, we admire Asha Parekh for living life on her own terms. And, we hope many more women will seek inspiration from her ability to love her own self. As she said, marriage is a two-way street, we couldn’t agree more!