Parenting is never easy. But it is even more difficult for single parents.
Juggling between the multiple responsibilities to be the mother as well as the father, these single parents need to be celebrated. But sadly our society, rather than applauding their courage, is quick to judge them for their unsuccessful marriage.
But, some inspiring souls never get bothered by society’s judgments and channel all their energy to give their kids a better future.
One such single parent is this father who became a father as well as a mother to his daughter and accompanied her throughout all the critical phases of life – from the first period to walking down the aisle.
While recalling her father’s sacrifice to raise her as a single parent, this daughter shares her inspiring story with HoB:
“I was 8 months old, when my mom left me and my dad.
So I’ve been raised by my dad, and his older sister. I even started addressing my dad’s elder sister as ‘Amma’. When our neighbours would say she isn’t my Amma, I’d cry to her and ask her the truth. She’d lovingly tell me she is my Amma and wipe my tears.
My dad was there for me every step of the way. I remember when I got my period for the first time — we were home alone, and I had no idea what was going on. I was so scared. But he calmed me down, explained what was happening and helped me change.
It was only when I turned 10, did he tell me about why my mother left. He said that she was very ambitious and couldn’t stay in the marriage — even the day she was leaving, he held me in his arms and ran behind her.
He asked her to stay for me, but she said, ‘I never had a child before marriage; it only happened after. So she is yours, not mine.’ I was devastated.
My dad didn’t get married again, because he was afraid of how my step mom would treat me.
What my dad told me that day, haunted me while I was growing up. I had so many unanswered questions and emotions that I didn’t know how to deal with.
So when I turned 21, I decided to confront it. I looked up my mom online and messaged her. I asked her to meet and she agreed. I was so excited!
But when I met her, she came with her two kids. And treated me like I was just another person. The only thing she said to me was, ‘Hi, how are you?’. I was heartbroken.
But I finally felt like I got some closure. That day, when I went back home, I realised that the way she treated her kids, with so much love and attention — was exactly how my dad had treated me. I felt grateful and blessed.
Recently I got married, and when he walked me down the aisle — in front of everyone he said, ‘When she was a baby, everyone told me a girl needs a mother, you cannot do it alone.
But I told them that I will prove, that I can be both a mother and a father for her.’ I had tears in my eyes.
My dad had a choice, to build a life of his own. But he chose to be there for me, to make so many sacrifices — and if I’m anything and anywhere today, I owe it all to him.”
At IFORHER, we applaud the courage of this father who made so many sacrifices to raise a strong and independent daughter on his own. His story of becoming a father as well as a mother to his daughter is quite an inspiration to all of us.