Though domestic violence is very common, many women still choose to suffer in silence. Very few women who suffer in marriage understand that abuse comes in steps, abusers push you a cinch by cinch every day.
More often than not we tend to make excuses for the abusers – we constantly tell ourselves that either we are not enough for them or we did provoke them. We tend to blame ourselves for their abusive behavior.
This powerful poem about abuse in marriage by Jodi Boyer shows how abuse victim tends to shut eyes or ignore abuser’s abusive behavior.
He Hit Me Today, But That’s Ok
Day 1. He called me fat today
but that’s ok because I did gain a few pounds.
At least he didn’t call me dumb.
Day 198. He called me stupid today,
but that’s ok because I am forgetful sometimes.
At least he doesn’t cheat on me.
Day 302. He told me I am not enough today and needs a side piece to satisfy his needs.
That’s ok because I’m a tired mom, not a supermodel.
I have health issues and work grueling shifts.
At least he doesn’t get physically abusive.
Day 439. He pushed me down today, but that’s ok because
I was obviously in his way & he was drunk.
At least I don’t have bruises.
Day 562. He squeezed my arm so hard today it left a mark.
That’s ok because he was focused on communication.
At least he didn’t punch me.
Day 612. He hit me so hard today that it gave me a headache.
That’s ok because I get headaches all the time and
I know he didn’t mean to hurt me.
Day 729. He hit me today and I have bruises and swelling.
That’s ok because I am a klutz and bruise easily.
At least I don’t have broken bones
Day 863. I woke up in the hospital today with tubes, wires,
Machines and hospital staff all around.
But it’s ok. I‘m still alive.
Day 1095. Today someone left flowers at my grave & whispered
“Why did she let him yet passed day 1?”
~ Jody M. Boyer ~
