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Home Relationships Family & In-Laws

Live With Or Without In-Laws: Women Sharing Experiences Is The Real Saas-Bahu Drama

by IForHer Team
March 20, 2022

Many women have come forward to share their real-life experiences of living with in-laws. While some had a really great experience, some shared how their life turned into hell when they started living with in-laws.

Here are some of the real-life experiences that women shared online about living with in-laws that shed some light on the reality:

Live-with-without-in-laws
Image: Thappad

1. Not Being Tolerated For Earning More Than Husband

 “My partner’s mother cannot tolerate that I earn more than my him and also doesn’t understand why I need him to participate equally in housework. She keeps saying her husband doesn’t even help her a bit and says I have it so much better because my partner helps me out though not equally.” – rmatthai

letter-mother in law-daughter in law
Screengrab: Two States

2. No Being Accepted As A Family Member & Being Alienated

 “My presence in their private space bothered them so they kept finding reasons to alienate me. I bore with it until they started accusing me of harming my sister in law’s children. And started instigating my husband. I called my father and poured my heart and and said I want a divorce. But they did not allow me to just leave. The drama that ensued made my sister in law’s husband separate from her and I went to my place with the kid. Eventually my husband realised that his family ain’t shit and came back to me.” – aluva_fox

Narcissistic-mother-in-law-ways-handle
Image: Screengrab from Khoobsurat

3. Accused For Not Pampering Their Badly Raised Son

“I was given a dialogue… “bahu ke rehte hue bhi bete ke peeche mujhe hi bhagna pad raha. (Doodh pile. Juice pile. Badam khale).” I’m not his PA either. Why can’t he make his own milk shake or whatever?” – my_100th_acc

society-shames-strong-confident-woman
Screengrab from Thappad

4. Huge Problem With Her Choice Of Clothes

“My in-laws have a huge problem with short clothes. So I don’t wear them in front of them. Arrangements have to be made to hide that but I can do that. My MIL also had a problem with me coming to the kitchen before taking a bath. I didn’t budge and I stood my ground. So she doesn’t say anything now.” – swat_mobile

Letter-In-Laws-Ghar-Ki-Izzat-Family-Honor
Image: Pexels

5. Living With In-laws Comes With Many Benefits Too

“I have been living with my in-laws ever since we got married. In my opinion there is nothing wrong in staying with in-laws. There are many benefits like my mother-in-law cooks the food, takes care of our child and treats me like her daughter.” –  Dr. Navya Mk

Screenshot: Naagin

6. When Husband Realized His Parents Wanted The Daughter-In-Law To Obey Them Like A Servant

“My parents wanted my wife to obey their word like the law. It got worse during the pandemic when I was working from home. I understood this is not going to work and moved out with my wife. My parents didn’t talk to me for 2 years and now they have started talking as if nothing ever happened.” – Justalurker1992

Mamma's-Boy-Toxic-mother-in-law
Image: Screengrab from Two States

7. Making Efforts To Know In-laws Before Marriage

“I thought long and hard before saying yes in an arranged marriage. We can’t escape in laws, so I had to make sure I got to know them before I said yes, kept my interactions with them separately from my would-be husband to try and form an independent bond with them. And only after understanding that I can gel with my in laws, I said yes.” –  level 1 love_marine_world

Letter-Mother-In-Law-On-Respect
Representative Image: Yamini Gautam Instagram

8. Some In-laws Do Take Care Of Daughters-In-Law As Their Own Child

“Without a blink I will stay with in-laws. I am extremely lucky to have awesome in-laws. My FIL is the biggest pillar of support for me. He takes care of me like a child. He will drop me and pick me up. My MIL is a very innocent person. She will always cook, purchase new traditional items, clothes, etc.” –  Riya Parth

Mother-in-law-daughter-in-law-kindess-is-what-we-need

9. Living With In-Laws Means Constant Visits By Relatives

“We are both doctors. My father-in-law, regularly visits us. We both are the only doctors in our whole family, so when ever any one suffers from even a trivial medical condition they consult with us and you’ll find some or the other relative at our house. We live in a 3BHK home so people think that their no inconvenience caused to us. But the truth is that after having a hectic day I want to come to my home and have a relaxed time not to entertain or nurse the relatives.” – Anonymous

Bride-India
Image: Pixabay

10. Living With In-Laws Could Be Priceless Too

“I’m an Indian working woman living with my mother-in-law. It is always good to have a mother-like figure at home to guide us and taunt us(sometimes). At the end of the day, you will always be received by someone at home and that feeling is priceless. Whenever I have to travel out of city for work, there is no need to worry about taking care of the home. And my MIL takes good care of my health and we both plan our expenses and future together.” – Janu

IFORHER-LETTER-EVERY-BRIDE
Representative Image

11. Living Close To Them, Rather Than With Them

“When my husband (boyfriend then) and I discussed marriage and life, I was very clear. I told him I would not stay with his parents, especially the first five years of our life together. It has been more than 20 years since I got married. We called my husband’s parents to the city we live in and bought a house for them 5 minutes away from ours. That way we are not in each others’ face, but we are still there for them and can reach out to them in no time if required, and we can take care of them and all their needs. For now, this works for me as well as for them.” –  Yamini Ayyagari

rani-mukherjee-bride-husband-childhood-ruin-marriage
Source: Pinkvilla

12. When In-Laws Are Not Comfortable With Your Way Of Living

“Personally I don’t prefer staying with in-laws 24/7 immediately after marriage. Consider this, They are in their late 50s and I – in my mid twenties. I would prefer a quick cooking, she might want an elaborate cooking, I would like to stay in tracks pants the whole day, she might want me to be at least in kurta. I would want to cuddle with my husband while watching TV, she might see it as another world…” – Priya Arun

Don’t forget to share your experience!

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