It is heartbreaking how women are labelled as the biggest villains in the family, just because they expect some love, care and time from their husbands. Even after being a life partner, it is quite shocking how a woman is treated like a culprit for desiring to spend some alone time with her husband; how she is labelled as a family breaker for expecting some love from her husband!
But, what could you expect from the society that fails to understand that marriage is for husband and wife too, and not just for families or parents? What could you expect from a society that shame men for being good husbands? What could you expect from the society that wants its daughters to give respect, but not demand it?
In the 5 years of my marriage, whenever I desired some “us” time with my husband, I have been shamed, insulted or blamed! I have been labelled as a villain, who was trying hard to separate a son from his parents; who was trying hard to break the family. I fail to understand how a wife expecting her husband to spend some time alone with her, could be labelled as someone who is trying break the family! How a romantic gesture of a husband and a wife going on a date could be seen as a sign of separating husband from his parents!
It is sad how my controlling in-laws made sure that my husband remains only a son.
They made sure to complain whenever my husband made even a small gesture to make me feel special. Whenever my husband made an attempt to shower some love and care over me; my controlling in-laws couldn’t stop being jealous or insecure whenever their son made an attempt to be a good husband!
But, this isn’t just my story. It is the story of many Indian married women, who are left alone in the marriage just because the controlling in-laws couldn’t let their son be a husband; it’s the story of many Indian married daughters-in-law, who are expected to leave everything behind for marriage for people, who never accept her as their own!
There are so many women who are harassed, just because they desire some love and care in their marriage.
But, what is even more saddening is the fact how men rather than asking their parents to change their controlling nature, ask their wives not to expect. In their attempt to be better sons, they let their wives struggle alone in the marriage. Rather than being there for the person, who left everything for them, our husbands leave us alone in the lonely marriage!
It is high time that Indian society understands that daughters-in-law are not vamps, who are trained to break the families. We just want love, care and respect!
So, stop shaming us for expecting some love from our husbands; stop harassing us for expecting the respect that we give to you! Stop being so controlling that you suck the life out of your own son’s marriage for your selfish goals! You can do better! If not for us, at least for your son – Stop controlling our marriage! We deserve better! Your son deserves better!