“I am getting married!”, my friends’ news set the one–month dead Whatsapp group into motion. The messages of congratulations and celebrations started pouring in.
Though I was happy for my friend, knowing how much she wanted to do an MBA, I couldn’t resist but wonder what happened? Anyway, I picked up the phone to congratulate her!
“Hey, Congratulations! What good news! Am so happy for you, Priya!
“Thanks, Neha. You have to definitely come. Otherwise, I am never going to talk to you.”
“Yeah, I will definitely come. How can I miss your wedding? So, will you be able to prepare for MBA with all the wedding preparations?”
“Yaar, I am not doing MBA anymore. With marriage, it will be very difficult to carry on with studies. I wanted to do it but, then my parents were getting tense as I turned 24. All my relatives started taunting and pressurizing me for my late marriage!”
“But, why don’t you tell them that you will get married once you finish your MBA!”
“I don’t want to hurt my parents’ feelings. They have done so much for me. And, now when they want me to marry, I couldn’t tell them NO! They already have so many problems, I don’t want to be one of their problems!”
“Hmm…”, I said in a disappointed and sad tone.
“Don’t be sad, Neha! Ankit has promised me that he will convince his family to let me study after marriage.”
“That’s good! Let’s hope you don’t have to give up on your dream for which you have worked so hard!”
Recently, Priya called me and shared how life hasn’t been very kind to her! She shared how she paid a hefty price for being a sincere daughter! She shared how she felt lonely in her marriage! How she feels cheated as Ankit hasn’t been able to convince his parents for her MBA. How she struggles with abusive and toxic in-laws while her husband makes efforts, but is unable to take a stand for her!
“Neha, I feel I have wasted my potential. I had so many dreams. Even after being a good student through out my school and college, I am struggling so much in my life. I don’t even have a life of respect and dignity! I thought marriage will bring happiness to my life, but it has just brought an endless series of sacrifices!
I keep wondering what would have happened if I would have took a stand for myself; If I would have told mummy papa that I won’t get married; If I would have completed my MBA and taken a job!
Now, I have to carry the burden of my broken dreams throughout my life. I killed my own dreams for the sake of my parents’ respect! I wish I wouldn’t have!”
It took me an hour to calm Priya down. Believe me, it is never easy to bear the burden of broken dreams. While Priya is planning to take actions to take a stand for herself, here are two cents for parents who push their daughters into marriage:
“Dear Parents, Don’t become desperate. Don’t pressurize your daughter to give up on her dreams. Don’t force her into marriage if she isn’t ready! Don’t make your daughter sacrifice her dreams for your happiness.
Don’t make her pay the price of being your daughter! Don’t let her bear the burden of broken dreams just because she wanted to be a good daughter! Don’t kill her dreams to please your own desperation! Let her dream; You have given her wings, so let her fly!