Time flies. It feels like yesterday when I was holding your hand to drop you in your class for your first day at school. Now, as you are gearing for one of your biggest days of life, I couldn’t hold the happiness in my heart.
Seeing you finding your life partner and falling in love with her made me so happy that I can’t even express it in words. I have seen you two argue, but I have also seen you holding each other in the dark times.
Though you guys are made for each other and I have no doubt that you will have a great married life, here is something that I want to share with you as a woman. After spending three years in marriage, I’ve seen the ups and downs. And during these phases, I have learned some things that I would like to share with you through this letter! Things I wish for you, the advice I want you to remember.
Though I know I haven’t been married long, but I feel there are so many things that I wished my husband and I knew before we got married!
I wish I could say marriage is going to be an easy journey. That dating was the hardest part. Sadly, the hard part has only begun.
Marriage is difficult. There would be days when you would like to scream at each other; There will be days when you will feel trapped; There will be days when you will feel like walking away. But believe me, marriage will always be more difficult for your bride than you! Being a woman is difficult. But being a married woman is even more difficult.
It is heartbreaking how marriage expects a woman to make much more sacrifices than a man.
She is expected to leave behind the comfort of her home to settle in a completely new home; She is expected to leave behind her parents to take care of yours; She is expected to change everything for sake of your and your parent’s happiness. While she may striving hard to fulfill those expectations, she may be shamed, insulted, and taunted.
She may feel very lonely, exhausted, and broken. In those moments, you need to stand by her. You need to protect her from sharp jibes of people! You need to stand by her, even when no one does.
Dear Brother, marriage is about ‘to love when you don’t want to’, ‘to choose which fights to pick and which to let go of’.
There would be times, when she would feel frustrated, annoyed, even mad at you for not being an ideal partner, at that moment take a little time to look at yourself. See what you’ve done in the situation. What could you do to improve things? How you could have handled it better?
Unlike many other men, please focus on bettering yourself and becoming a selfless husband, rather than pointing a finger at her (even if it is totally and completely her fault!).
Marriage is a choice that you make every day – to love your wife, to be with her when things get tough, to be her biggest supporter, to be her best friend, to be her soul mate. And, while you are striving hard to be there for her, believe me she is trying really hard to be there for you!
It’s not the good times that make marriage stronger. It’s the hard ones.
The hard times when husband-wife refuse to leave each others’ side, the hard times when we are being misunderstood by the whole world except one, when the world attempts hard to separate husband-wife but they don’t!
It is up to you both to decide whether those hard times will tear your marriage apart or make it stronger. You have a choice to make. And, hope you will let those moments and seasons strengthen your marriage. I hope you will make the same choice every day that you are about to make tomorrow – that this marriage is worth fighting for, that your bride is worth fighting for! I know it may seem like a lot ofhard work, but it is worth it.
I couldn’t be happier for you and hope you will an ideal husband that every wife wishes for!