Fighting abuse is never easy. While many of us are quick to judge the victim and expect them to leave the relationship or marriage, it is not so easy for the victim. Sometimes it is about kids, sometimes it is distorted thoughts of things getting better, and sometimes it’s broken self-worth. But whatever the reason it could be to stay back, it shows how one needs immense courage and support to move out of an abusive marriage.
One such story of courage is of this wife and her brave kids, who stood against their abusive father to build a life of respect, love, and dignity for themselves.
Recently, one of the kids shared with HoB their inspiring and brave battle against the abuse that we felt need to be celebrated:
“Dad often brought this woman home claiming she was his friend. When mom questioned him, he’d beat her.
One day, I found mom weeping in her bedroom. She’d found sex videos of them, and emails revealing that they even had a child. I don’t know if mom ever confronted him, but after a point, it didn’t matter. He went on trips with her without any explanation.
The abuse and mom’s bruises worsened.
Her doctor told us that if the abuse continued, she’d get paralysed. That’s when mom decided to move out with us– over the next 2 weeks, her friend helped us find an apartment. Mom worked at a travel company, and Didi and I started teaching art and phonetics to kids to cover expenses.
This was our life for 2 years. Initially, dad called everyday, but we refused to tell him where we were. He was furious and threatened that he’d hire people to kill us. ‘5 lakhs per body’, he’d say. That’s when mom changed her number and Didi and I blocked his number.
2 years later, he saw me when I was walking to college. He ran over and told me he’d renovated the house. He said, ‘Let’s sort things out. Try convincing mom.’ I told him, ‘I can’t assure anything’ and walked away.
Then we started getting calls from relatives.
They told us he’d change and that we’re ruining the family image. We were struggling financially and since the home was still under moms name too, we moved back. Initially, we all stayed in 1 room.
Dad yelled at us for not giving mom and him privacy, but Didi and I refused to leave mom alone with him.
6 months later, he decided to move and threatened to not help us financially. He thought we’d follow, but we were managing on our own. Finally, we filed a case against him for domestic abuse.
2 years later, he came home one night and started shouting, ‘Now see what I’ll do to you. You’ll see the worst of me.’ Didi and I were out. Mom locked herself in the room and called the police. They took him to the station. We didn’t see or hear from him for the next 2 years.
3 months back, he decided to move back again after his mom died. He got an order from court that he could, but cameras were installed in our house. Now he lives in a separate room with his dad, and we don’t talk. We’re always in our room or out on drives or walks.
We feel safer now after filing the case. Didi and I have good jobs, and mom is an EA to a MD! With my first salary, I bought mom an iPhone– she’d wanted it for so long. She hugged me and cried. We even have enough savings now to get Didi married. Mom’s bruises are healing.
We are slowly moving past the death threats and abuse, slowly healing.”
At IFORHER, we are in awe of this inspiring family as they battled their circumstances like true warriors and moved out of an abusive relationship. In times, when women are suffering from the increasing domestic violence during the lockdown, we need more courageous stories of people showing immense bravery. People who do not let abuse define their lives and taking bold steps towards the life of love, dignity, and care. (Also Read: 14 Best NGOs Working For Women Empowerment In India)