Honestly, I never felt the need to get married. I was very happy with my dream job and lazy weekends and a life without expectations.
As I turned 26, my friends started getting married and for the next two years, I saw all my friends getting married and happy. But, things didn’t turn out as per their expectations for them.
And after 2 years of marriage, most of them felt that getting married wasn’t the best decisions of their life.
I felt why not learn from their mistakes and avoid all the drama that happens in one’s life post marriage. So, I decided to stay single and happily with the most understanding parents in this world until I met Raghav.
With him, everything seemed to be worth it. I realized that all the drama comes with a heart full of love and affection.
When I was about to get married, my father shared the secret of Ma-Pa’s successful marriage, which I felt was the best marriage advice that anyone ever gave to me.
And, I want to share it with you in a hope that it can help you the way it has helped me:)
Pa: So Gudiya is ready to leave her ma & pa for a guy who doesn’t even know how to tie a knot properly.
(Yes, Pa calls me gudiya and Raghav doesn’t know how to tie a perfect knot :P)
Me: I can stay with you forever. I can tell Raghav that there is a change in the plan!
Pa: You are so much like your mother. A month before our wedding day, we had a huge fight. It was one of those disagreements that happened during marriage preparation. And, we had a heated argument. She didn’t speak to me for a week. I always felt she would call me or write a letter to tell me that there is a change in plan. But, here we are celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary 🙂
Me: Wooow! I didn’t think you and mom could ever fight. You are this perfect couple who always get each other.
Pa: No one is perfect. Though I am close to perfection still I am not perfect.
(He says this as he laughs to make his point that no one is perfect)
(I just couldn’t stop smiling either, as coincidently I also fought with Raghav for some stupid marriage tradition that I don’t believe in. And, we were not talking to each other since the argument.)
Me: So tell me one thing. If there is a fight between a couple, how do you suggest a couple should solve it?
(He looks at me as if he got the subtle hint that I wanted to give it to him)
Pa: Okay, I can answer that question. But a disclaimer, don’t try to judge my answer. My answer would have been the same if you have been a boy.
(I nodded meekly)
Pa: I am assuming that the couple is still in love with each other and want to make it work. And, during the fight there has been no abuse of power.
(I again nodded to share my agreement)
Pa: Then I will share what your mother and I always followed. We learned it from the best couple in this whole world – Cup & Saucer – to resolve couple issues.
Me:*confused* Cup & Saucer?
Pa: Yes. As a couple be always be like a cup & saucer. No matter how hot the cup is, saucer always helps to reduce the heat. Be like a saucer in life. When arguments happen, the heat goes up. So, don’t get heated like a cup at that time. Be a saucer.
Pa: And, based on life situations, husband and wife might take turns in becoming Cup and Saucer, but it is important to maintain the balance. Becoming Cup is easy but becoming Saucer is difficult. And, that’s why your mother and I gift ourselves a cup and saucer every wedding anniversary.
Me: *Holding a saucer in my hand* I need to give a call to my Cup.
Pa: You mean Raghav!
Me: Thanks Pa! (Hug)
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