In case you are wondering when is Father’s day this year, then it is on 18th June 2023. So, don’t forget to wish your dad Happy Father’s Day and thank him for all that he does for you. Though there are countless ways to wish your dad Happy Father’s Day, we have compiled a list of some funny Father’s Day quotes if your dad enjoys humor. We know it’s never easy to tell your dad how much you love him but these hilarious Father’s Day quotes are here to help. You can either write these funny Father’s Day quotes as a message in your Father’s Day card or add a one-liner to your Instagram post honoring Dad. So, take some inspiration from these funny Father’s Day quotes and get your dad to chuckle in no time. You can also try these Father’s Day inspirational quotes or messages to let him know how special he is.
Funny Father’s Day Quotes
1. “When you’re young, you think your dad is Superman. Then you grow up, and you realize he’s just a regular guy who wears a cape.” – Dave Attell
2. “I gave my father $100 and said, ‘Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.’ So he went out and bought a present for my mother.” – Rita Rudner
3. “Sometimes I am amazed that my wife and I created two human beings from scratch yet struggle to assemble the most basic IKEA cabinets.” – Greg Kinnear
4. “I turned out awesome and so good looking for that I salute you, dad. Happy Father’s Day!” – Anonymous
5. “When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, ‘Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?’ He answered, ‘If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.’” —Jerry Lewis
6. “We wondered why when a child laughed, he belonged to Daddy, and when he had a sagging diaper that smelled like a landfill, ‘He wants his mother.’” —Erma Bombeck.
7. “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant, I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.” —Mark Twain
8. “Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.” —Jon Stewart
9. “Happy Father’s Day From Your Favourite Mistake” – Anonymous
10. “Being a dad is the greatest pain in the ass in the world you could possibly be involved in. That is the ultimate dad-ness, full dad-ness.” – Jerry Seinfeld
11. “On our 6 a.m. walk, my daughter asked where the moon goes each morning. I let her know it’s in heaven visiting daddy’s freedom.” – Ryan Reynolds
12. “When you got more than one kid, you just wake up angry.” – Kevin Hart
13. “Remember: What dad really wants is a nap. Really.”– Dave Barry
14. “I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, ‘My dad can beat up your dad.’ I’d say, ‘Yeah? When?’” —Bill Hicks
15. “I love how we don’t need to say out loud that I am your favorite child.” – Anonymous
Hilarious Father’s Day Quotes
16. “I feel like the success of parenthood is feeling like I failed all day today, but I get to wake up tomorrow and do it again and hopefully they turn out to be a good human being.” – Justin Timberlake
17. “Being a dad isn’t just about eating a huge bag of gummy bears as your wife gives birth. It means being comfortable with the word hero” – Ryan Reynolds
18. “If my kid vanished on a plane like that Jodie Foster movie, I’d spend maybe two or three hours enjoying the legroom and quiet before I started looking.” – Ken Jennings
19. “There should be a children’s song: ‘If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep.’” – Jim Gaffigan
20. “I smile because you are my dad. I laugh because there is nothing that you can do about it. Happy Father’s Day!” – Anonymous
21. “You can tell what was the best year of your father’s life because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.” – Jerry Seinfeld
22. “The worst part about being a parent is when one of your kids farts and you have to pretend it wasn’t cool.” – Rob Delaney
23. “By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong.” – Charles Wadsworth
24. “The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get.” – Tim Russert
25. “My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, ‘You’re tearing up the grass.’ ‘We’re not raising grass,’ Dad would reply. ‘We’re raising boys.’ – Harmon Killebrew
26. “Having a kid is like falling in love for the first time when you’re 12, but every day.”- Mike Myers
27. “Any man can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad.” —Anne Geddes
28. “Having children is like living in a frat house—nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.” —Ray Romano
29. “My sisters and I can still recite Dad’s grilling rules: Rule No. 1: Dad is in charge. Rule No. 2: Repeat Rule No. 1.” —Connie Schultz
30. “Happy Father’s Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks.” ― Anonymous
31. “Whenever one of my children says, ‘Goodnight, Daddy,’ I always think to myself, ‘You don’t mean that.” —Jim Gaffigan
32. “It is so embarrassing how I went from a person who did not care about anyone’s children. Then you have them, and you brag about the same stuff that you never cared about. And you tell people, he’s got four teeth like they care.” —Seth Meyers
33. “I’ve been to war. I’ve raised twins. If I had a choice, I’d rather go to war.” – George W. Bush
34. “My daughter got me a ‘World’s Best Dad’ mug. So we know she’s sarcastic.” – Bob Odenkirk
35. “Happy Father’s Day! Dad, I hope that this gift is only half as disappointing as I am.” – Anonymous
36. “I’ve been to war. I’ve raised twins. If I had a choice, I’d rather go to war.” —George W. Bush
37. “Having children is like having a bowling alley installed in your brain.” – Martin Mull
38. “Nobody appreciates Daddy. I’m talking about the real daddy that handles the [expletive] business. Nobody ever says, ‘Hey, Daddy, thanks for knocking out this rent!’ ‘Hey, Daddy, I sure love this hot water!’ ‘Hey, Daddy, it’s easy to read with all this light!’” – Chris Rock
39. “Don’t Tell Mom” – The best advice you ever gave me. Happy Father’s Day! – Anonymous
40. “Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories.” ―John Wilmot
41. “Even though I’m proud my dad invented the rear-view mirror, we’re not as close as we appear.” —Stewart Francis.
Hope you have found the perfect message out of these funny Father’s Day quotes for your card!