Dear Indian Parents,
One more kid choked under the burden of unfulfilled parental dreams and unrealistic societal expectations. We would like to ask how many more kids need to succumb to death before you realize that your expectations are murdering your own child.
You may feel your unchecked expectations and control is the motivation for your kid’s excellence. But, the reality is just the opposite.
More often then not, it leaves kids feeling inadequate and less!
If you still feel your expectations are pushing your kids towards success, we may like to share what recently happened in Madurai that would break your heart.
According to ToI, Jothi Sri Durga, 19, who was preparing for NEET, ended her life by committing suicide in her home in Madurai in the early hours of Saturday. She was a medical aspirant, who was preparing for her NEET exam which is scheduled for Sunday. She was attending her coaching classes to crack NEET in her second attempt.
In her heartbreaking 7-page long suicide note, Durga mentioned that if she didn’t get a medical seat, she would disappoint her family members and others.
She has specified to her father that no one should be blamed for her death and she is scared of facing NEET exams. Along with the suicide note, she also recorded a video. Jothi mentioned that though she prepared well for NEET, she is worried about performing well in the exams. She also told her father to take care of her brother.
This audio is going viral on social media and many are condemning the government to cancel NEET exams. NEET exams have already caused a stir in Tamil Nadu in the past with Anitha committing suicide as she could not compete in the competitive exams.
It is heartbreaking how this teenager was so scared of failure and not able to fulfill her family expectation that she gave up her life.
Maybe things could have been different if someone could have spoken with this young girl to tell her that no exam result can make her unworthy of love. Someone could have explained to her that she wasn’t a failure if she doesn’t crack an exam. Someone could have given her a hug and told her that she was not letting anyone down!
The increasing number of suicides among young Indian kids makes us wonder why we Indian parents get so much obsessed about our kids’ achievements and milestones that we forget to teach them the most important life skill – HOW TO HANDLE A FAILURE?
We need to remember that our kids are ‘humans’ with their own desires, dreams, aspirations, and potential. And, we can’t be projecting our unfulfilled dreams on our child. We need to stop forcing our child to do something which we couldn’t achieve. She/he is not a tool to fulfill our unaccomplished aspirations and desires. He/she is different.
Let them carve their own path. Let them pursue their own dreams! And, let them fly in a sky painted by their own aspirations.
Let them know that irrespective of what they achieve or not achieve, you would love them anyway. And, whenever things will go wrong, you will always be standing right behind them. You’ll always have their back!
At IFORHER, we are mourning the death of this young girl and hope her parents gather enough courage to accept the ugly reality of their daughter’s death.
R.I.P Jothi, You’ll be missed!
